The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
THESE ARE METAPHORS FROM ACTUAL SCHOOL EXAM ESSAYS.
Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the centre
Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left York at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Peterborough at 4:19p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.
John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
The thunder was ominous sounding, much like the sound of a thin sheet of metal being shaken backstage during the storm scene in a play.
The red brick wall was the color of a brick-red crayon.
Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for while.
It came down the stairs looking very much like something no one had ever seen before.
The dandelion swayed in the gentle breeze like an oscillating electric fan set on medium.
It was a working class tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with their power tools.
It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.
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5 comments
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I cried laughing.
Dec 23rd
Yep freakin funny allright.
Jan 24th
These people should enter the Bulwer-Lytton contest!
Jan 23rd
Forgot to mention, these and more can be found here: http://www.e
-jokes.net/true/029.htm (quite obviously I don't want to be sued.)
Jan 23rd
This is too freakin' funny! LOL.
Jan 23rd